There are different types of shop browsers, i've listed them below.
Chatter Shoppers
These are the shoppers that walk in on their mobile phone at the top of their vocal chords and leave still on it. They don’t really look at anything just touch things and spend the entire time telling the whole world their woes and draw contents.
Rail swingers
These shoppers barge in usually sniffing up really aggressively as their nose may drop if they don’t create a temporary vacuum and these browsers rush through the rails at the speed of light browsing for designer labels. They can be quite aggressive in their approach to the rails and often scare older customers away.
Moochers
My personal favourite, the browsers who actually browse and mooch. They look at everything, often stopping for a good ten minutes reading the contents of a book until they realise they already have it at home, and these browsers usually always buy something.
Nit Pickers
Now these browsers are tricky. You can gurantee they will bring items to the till and as your about to ring them in, they inform you they have only brought it to your attention because it is a)sized wrong, b)damaged/stained etc. They keep us on our feet as much as we don’t like when we miss something they NEVER do. They never buy anything.
Jumble Stompers
Browsers who knock everything off the hangers, then walk all over it. I don’t understand this action. They kind of stomp on it infact I’ve seen grown women usually 40-55 knock an item of clothing on the floor and jump up and down thinking no one is looking.
Chud Studs
Usually always men. They walk around and “cough” or “sneeze” and out comes a piece of chewing gum straight onto the carpet and then their wife/girlfriend/child usually stands on it.
David Dickinson
These are not really browsers at all more like vultures who scour for a bargain. Bargains that are worth money to sell on and if they can get it reduced well below the label price they revel in it.
They usually have a magnifying glass (always men for some reason?!), a tape measure and usually come in couples. They buy different things which when they leave you often are left wondering if you will see the item on ”flog it” or antiques road show. Oh if you were thinking these browsers were orange they are not sorry if I misled you.
